Oh god i just want sleep.
The idea of sleep never felt so good.
I just want to bury myself in the soft covers,
slip the duvet over the tip of my head,
peek out and know… that i can duck back in.
Things have been insane… with prep for The Ship, and allll the other work that’s happening after. I don’t know why i do this to myself. WHY. Is it the Asian genes in me? Why can’t i just fucking relax and just… BE.
I think my Instagram is very misleading. I post only cool pictures of me doing stuff like getting hand massages and lying around. It’s not true! Those were taken during the FEW minutes i had in the entire DAY i could pretend that is my life.
Everyday i think about:
what i have to do today, and tomorrow, the week and month after,
the jobs, and timing, and who i can delegate what out to,
upcoming projects all the way up till June,
my LIFE plan – where i see the company, where i see MYSELF,
invoices, emails, advertorials, editing, product lists, people management…
God just writing that makes me wanna… SLEEP.
I AM SO TIRED
Today i thought about this blogpost i wrote recently about how i wake up feeling SO HAPPY that i had a song playing in my head and i felt like dancing upon rising. That was true.
What is also true, is that i feel the complete opposite on some days.
I didn’t think i was gonna admit it here. But i felt like a pretender if i didn’t say outright how SHITTY i feel on occasional days. Yesterday was an extremely shitty day. Today was kinda hard as well. I heard it was a full moon yest hence… if you were feeling crap too, you know you can blame it on the Universe and its energy. Well, not *blame*, but… you know what i mean.
So i woke up and i was feeling really sad.
Like, just REALLY SAD.
There was nothing for me to be SAD about. Nothing!
But i just… FELT it.
I messaged one of the spiritual friends turned gurus i fortunately have in my life.
Me: “I feel a little sad today”
S: “What’s going on girl?”
Me: “I don’t know… i’m still lying in bed despite supposed to have got up. I just want hugs and cuddles and love.”
S: “Allow yourself to feel. We can’t know how to truly be happy without knowing its polarity.”
I know that. There will always be balance in life. Yin and yang. Without darkness there cannot be light. I know you’re supposed to FEEL all you have in you. Don’t keep it in. Feel it, and let it go (omg Frozen was right). When you suppress your true emotions, you are hurting yourself by burying them in you. That energy is then stuck in you… it needs to be released so you can be free.
Look, i know all this. So i lay there, feeling the sadness and trying to let it all out.
It’s better than pretending you’re not feeling it, bottling it up, continuing with your day, and then possibly unknowingly aggressively bestowing it on unsuspecting victims around you.
S: “So what happened la”
Me: “Nothing happened! I shouldn’t be searching for the reason i’m sad right. Maybe it’s work stress.”
S: “Keep going”
Me: “Maybe i miss being at home. And just BEING. Maybe i’m overwhelmed?”
Me: “Feel like i’m not doing things right. Or enough.”
S: “Why do you feel you need to do right? Or enough.”
Me: “Maybe it’s my Chinese genes” (me trying to be funny)
S: “Know, that nothing you do will make you any less of a wonderful person. Thus, nothing you do can make you any better or greater. You already are Great. So just do. That thing you do.”
And that was my lesson for the day.
That no matter what i do… i am the person i am.
And you are the person you are.
We try our best, and some days we feel crap, some days we feel awesome.
Let’s just hug it out.
GOD I NEED A HUG OR MANY MANY HUGS.
I’ve been in a daze since i got back. It’s not even jetlag cos there’s barely any time diff with Japan, i think it’s just all the constant running around, being up early and sleeping late, too little sleep, and a lot of press meetings and partying. I spent HOURS unpacking from all my trips, and haven’t been so happy to be AT HOME in so long.
The cleaner is over and i was just lying on my sofa staring out at the impending storm thinking, “Maybe i should just give myself this weekend to do NOTHING. When was the last time i just stared out the window…”
And at that very second,
a giant gust of wind blew so strongly,
my entire curtain billowed up above me like a waving sail,
and just extended over me beautifully for what seemed like a long while.
It was like a movie scene.
I’m taking it as a sign to just let myself not edit pictures or work until Monday morning.
And then… it’s choo choo cray train all the way till January.
Lessons i learnt this week:
1. Don’t participate in any activity that contributes to another’s darkness. It will still be a part of your path. Move only towards that is light.
2. Listen to that tiny voice in your head. Don’t push it away. Make it stronger.
3. Don’t trust people so easily. Be smart that not everyone out there is as nice and believable.
Something else i bumped into IG recently after having read the article on it some time back:
Here’s something else i’d like to share, an article on being busy that Yishyene shared with me: The Disease of Being Busy
Sekian. It’s fairy time.
I just got back home after a whirlwind trips x 5 countries. Was up till 4:30am in Osaka last night replying emails, then slept till 5:25am to get up for my flights from Osaka-Narita-KL. I figured my waking time was better spent when there is internet around me, so being awake at hotel > being awake on plane. I passed out the moment i buckled my seatbelt in Osaka. I don’t even remember the plane taking off. When i next woke, we’d landed in Narita. I was like, “Damn!” cos i had a whole row of three seats and intended to lie down after takeoff! -_-
Slept all the way home to KL. Things weren’t going so well in the airport. First i discovered that my phone line is barred (i don’t know if it’s my RM700 bill BUT i just checked that it’s paid for cos i auto debit) and i accidentally broke a bottle of duty free Chardonnay -_-’ I wasn’t too fazed tho… just shrugged it off and thought instead of how well all my trips went, and this was just a little bit of Life Tax.
Came home, dropped my bags, fed myself, got on to the laptop and BAM, 3 hours later i think it’s time to unpack. A little bit at least. I’m so tired! (But yet here i am blogging.) As i was taking a shower, i was thinking about how i have the best team ever!
They’re a small team… but hell did they take on a whole lot the past two weeks.
Because i was away, i wasn’t able to keep track on everything that was going on in KL anymore. I had to learn how to cut the apron strings and just TRUST that they would do okay. Ahhh it was so scary for me at first but i had to just STOP being a mother hen and leave them to their devices.
They were awesome… they ran Seek & Keep in BSC without me, set up the shop and handled the social media. After Seek & Keep they organised a photoshoot for the new products for the KBF online store. Then they handled the coming in of the stock for The Ship, coordinated, labeled and packed everything to send to the Livescape office TODAY, so that everything can reach Singapore in time.
They even worked overtime and at odd hours to accommodate when i’d be online overseas.
They even make me laugh.
You guys are the best, i love you!!!!
From left to right: Jane, Weng Yee, SweetEe, and Joe.
Jane was our first intern last year, and is now our freelance photographer. She’s recognisable from her sleeve tattoo, a fierce stark contrast to her ethereal tender images. You can view her work at www.hellojanelee.com, she does great wedding shoots!
Weng Yee is our new Fairy Intern, she’s helped heaps in her short tenure here. People ask me how and where i find these amazing interns, and i tell them that not everyone that comes through is amazing! There are some that are different and don’t work out, and others i’m lucky to have. Weng Yee is going to Cameron Highlands Resort tomorrow to cover a 3D/2N-stay for KBF. She deserves it, i’ve been working the poor girl to the ground.
SweetEe… oh SweetEe Her designation on her name card is Senior Pegasus Officer. I don’t really care what people put on their name cards cos they’re all labels anyway, we all do so many different things, so i let her choose what she wanted to call herself. She’s basically my right hand woman. She is her namesake and is as sweet as they come. Also a bit blur (sorry you know it’s true!) but as someone mentioned, “Blur in an endearing way.” Sweet handles the operations, accounts and general every day stuff at KBF. She even helps me drop off superimportant cheques to my lawyer (THANK YOU!!). She’s currently attending a Kiehl’s event in Seoul in my place, but has been getting what needs to be done while she’s away. (Please don’t slack after reading this :p)
And then there’s Joe, our Junior Wizard Diva. He came in as our freelance graphic designer but we love him so much that we keep bringing him in to do other random things too. Like working with Weng Yee the past few days to pack and deliver the stock while Sweet and i were away.
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We are still looking for sales people to join us on our sales team on board The Ship!
Each person has to work 2x 4-hour shifts per day in exchange for full boarding and meals on board The Ship, Asia’s biggest festival at sea! More details *here*
*Written by Weng Yee & Pics by SweetEe*
With human teleportation as yet unavailable, Joyce decided to send SweetEe and I to cover the Rimowa event as she was overseas. Traffic into the city was horrendous as usual but we made it just in time to catch the travel stories of Wei-Hsiang Chong, Managing Director of Milk PR; Elizabeth Lee, Founder of Bowerhaus Jewellery; Benjamin Yong, Founder of THE BIG Group; Celest Thoi, Bridal Gown Designer and Owner at Celest Thoi; Yoong Yoon Li, Executive Director of Royal Selangor; and Muhaini Mahmud, Director of Corporate Affairs, Weststar Group.
On display were also seven special cases customised with new and exciting artwork.
Really love the tiger one! Definitely wouldn’t miss that on the luggage carousel.
After helping ourselves to canapés and a drink, we settled into a corner to watch a short video that showcased the busy lifestyles of the aforementioned and how Rimowa has always been their choice of suitcase with it’s durability and style.
Following the short video, each of the personalities were invited up on stage for a short chat (save for Elizabeth Lee as she was unable to make it).
Benjamin Yong of BIG Group and Charles Yong, General Manager of Rimowa Far East Limited.
Did you know that Ben has been a fan of Rimowa for more than 10 years? He has 32 Rimowa suitcases and counting. Now that is probably one of the most impressive collections I have ever heard of!
On left Yoong Yoon Li, Executive Director of Royal Selangor; and on right Wei-Hsiang Chong, Managing Director of Milk PR.
CLICK TO READ MORE
Damn. My blog just can’t keep up with my life anymore.
I realised a couple of days ago that i’ve been in 5 cities in the past 7 days.
Wednesday i woke up in London.
Thursday i woke up in Paris.
Sunday i was in KL.
Monday i was in Tokyo.
And today, Tuesday (thinking… yes it’s Tuesday!) i’m in Osaka.
How crazy is that!
One of immigration officers casually asked, ”Where are you flying to?” and i totally stoned cos i momentarily forgot where i was off to next.
What a marvelous problem to have.
To not remember where i’m gonna fly to next…
I would never have thought i’d have this kind of life!
I mean… i would dream and imagine i would, but to think it’s all actually happening so regularly… how AMAZING life is!
Been meeting the most inspirational and creative folks across the world,
all with massive hearts and minds.
I am a lucky girl. Can’t wait till i’m back home so i can settle back in and tell all my stories.
It’s late here in Osaka, i need to wake up at 6am to get some emails done.
For now, here’s my current favourite song that i’ve playing every single morning to give myself a semblance of calm and joy when i get ready FOR A NEW DAY.
Give every day your fucking best and the world will return you so much more.
You get on for FREE if you work for KinkyBlueFairy on The Ship!
KinkyBlueFairy is looking for a team of FUN & PASSIONATE people to work with us on It’s The Ship!
Boarding and all meals (worth min. USD1200) will be provided (excl. tax and gratuities which come up to RM800). Not bad considering you get to be on Asia’s largest festival at sea for 5D/4N with all meals and non-alcoholic drinks included. Each person will have to work 2x 4-hour shifts per day.
Interested please email firstname.lastname@example.org.
Hurry cos we have 10 spots available!!
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I can’t even explain THE MAGNITUDE OF THE PARTY that is about to take place at sea on one of the biggest cruise liners in the world!
4 nights of an epic experience partying on a cruise.
Singapore to Langkawi and back.
International acts including Lil Jon, Dash Berlin, Basement Jaxx, Chvrches, Aeroplane, Crookers, and MANY MORE.
Damn just watch the videos already.
I think this might be Asia’s best party YET.
The floating music festival which takes place from the 21st – 25th of November 2014 will set sail from Singapore to the tropical island of Langkawi, Malaysia before embarking on a journey back towards Singapore. Guests will be spending 5 days and 4 nights on board one of the largest and most luxurious cruise liners in the world, Royal Caribbean International’s “Voyager of The Seas”. At Langkawi, the ship will dock for 12 hours where a beach party of epic proportions will be hosted by Lil Jon for 3,800 guests.
Onboard, get ready to be pampered by Royal Caribbean’s famed 5-star service and wide ranging facilities including a state-of-the-art fitness centre and spa, a 9,000 sq. ft. casino, 10 swimming pools and whirlpools, 13 bars and clubs, a duty free shopping promenade, and many more. Then, there’s the music festival. Four massive stages specially designed to take place on board the cruise liner which will feature some of the world’s biggest names in music such as, Dash Berlin, Basement Jaxx, Chvrches, Aly & Fila, SBCR (The Bloody Beetroots), Sasha Grey and over 30 other international and regional acts. More information on the acts and cruise liner can be found at www.itstheship.com
Scroll down www.itstheship.com for more info
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KBF followers will ALSO have a unique promo code to book cabins for The Ship at 15% discount.
Unique code is: KBFAIRY.
Limited to the first 50 cabins booked only!
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//// Contest over ////
KinkyBlueFairy is giving away a 1x FREE CABIN on board The Ship!
(taxes and gratuities to be borne by passenger). Sleeps 2 to 4 pax. Worth over USD2,000!
Just repost the picture above on your IG and/or FB and hashtag #kbfgiveaway #itstheship #its2014
Contest deadline: 12pm Wed 12th Nov 2014.
Winner will be chosen at random.